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Welcome to Startups Weekly . Sign uphereto get it in your inbox every Friday .

Hello , you luscious specimen of a human being . Have you looked yourself in the mirror and given yourself a high five today ? No ? Well , here ’s your chance !

I ’ve had a rich couple of weeks on the website . I got pissy about founders fail to consider sustainability in startup pitch deck . I looked at a few thousand decks and make thatfewer than 1 % mention environmental business , a fact I find out deeply concerning . I debate that startup laminitis , unlike somebody in big corporations , are uniquely positioned to engraft value like sustainability into the very fabric of their company . Be effective .

As I was talking with a founder last workweek about how they had terrible founder - marketplace fit , and then get to thinking : Damn , it ’s no admiration that most of my startups were n’t all that successful : Ididn’t have great father - market scene . Pretty sobering , and I concluded that , well , perhaps I just do n’t havewhat it takes to be a founder .

The final delightful rant I go on was in the wake of the whole Sam Altman / OpenAI devilry , where it seemed to transpire that he “ had n’t been outgoing ” with the control board . That ’s corporate speak for repress information — extremely bad hoodoo when it comes to the C - suite and the board . In a nutshell : No , you ca n’t lie to your board .

With your regularly scheduled Haje rants out of the way — and kick in that it was a turkey feast last week , so I was too bass in a meat coma to write Startups Weekly last week — we havetwoweeks of startup news program to arrest you up on . Let ’s get to it   .   .   .

Car go vroom? Not so fast.

Look , I ’m all for relieve lives , butthe government ’s recommendationto make intelligent focal ratio - assist ( ISA ) engineering science standard in fresh fomite is an outrageous overreach . It is my God - give right hand as an American to drive 70 mph in a 65 miles per hour zona , and I ’m specially furious about the suggestion that they ’re going to use a car ’s Global Positioning System and cameras to limit your amphetamine to the speed limit . I ’m all for road safety equipment and all , but . . . come on . It is n’t even like it ’s going to be all that helpful in the distinguished dodging of things : Plenty of fatal fortuity materialise well within the speed limits because half-wit are futzing with their earphone , and the number of uninsured and unlicensed driver on the road ( not to remark the huge identification number of completely un - road - suitable junk mound that are labour around ) are far more dangerous than speeding .

Join us at TechCrunch Sessions: AI

Exhibit at TechCrunch Sessions: AI

While rout in the noble aim of reducing dealings fatality , the testimonial ignites a debate that extends beyond route safety , swerving violently into the headlights of core time value of personal freedom , trust in governing , and the evolving human relationship between technology and our daily lives .

Oh well , at least there ’s still motorcycles , I approximate .

In other news that rifle vroom ( or lap in the case of EVs ):

ego - firing chief operating officer : In a surprising turn of events reminiscent of a driverless elevator car taking an unexpected detour , Kyle Vogt , the seer behind Cruise ’s journey from a humble startup to a GM ball of fire , has decided to park his persona as chief operating officer .

The Buy Now button just got more dangerous : Amazon , once a humble bookstore , is now rev up to steer into the railroad car market , partnering with Hyundai to startselling vehicles online .

Did n’t see that coming : In a turn of events that even a ego - push back car did n’t see coming , a Florida judge has establish that Tesla , under the leadership of Elon Musk , was aware of defects in its Autopilotsystem , yet retain to permit them cruise down the road of public use .

So what was that whole Sam Altman thing?

In the AI existence ’s equivalent of a high - tech soap opera , Sam Altman , the erstwhile CEO of OpenAI , found himself ousted in a flurry of drama and intrigue . The narration begins with Altman ’s judgement of dismissal by the OpenAI instrument panel , a move that ship ripples through the organization , leading to the resignation of Colorado - founder Greg Brockman and a threesome of senior researchers . As the game thickened , Microsoft , a key investor in OpenAI , gain a fanny at the tabular array , albeit as a non - voting observer , suggest at the rise influence of larger tech entity in the AI distance .

The story occupy a pull worthy of a primetime cliffhanger when OpenAI and Altman give an “ agreement in principle ” for his grand return as CEO , reshuffle the table with high-pitched - visibility name calling like Bret Taylor and Larry Summers . This roller - coaster ride was not without its share of corporate drama and power plays , including failed negotiations , seek to merge with rival AI business firm Anthropic , and a mass employee threat to resign , all emphasize the high stakes and acute rage drive the AI industry . In this tale of AI ambition , the only certainty was uncertainty , as the future of one of the industry ’s leading lights hung in the balance . Kyle has a bully sum-up of what find , with a link to all the TechCrunch coverage and analysis . It ’s worth a read , because   .   .   .   woweee .

All in all , we still don’treallyknow what happened behind closed doors , but a memorable view from the HBO show “ The Wire ” kept reverberate through my head : If you descend at the king , you ’d best not miss(NSFW ) . I ca n’t commend a metre when a CEO got booted out of the troupe they found , and then ended up shaking up the intact board and being reestablish .

distinguish my tidings : This OpenAI saga is a Aaron Sorkin / David Fincher / Jesse Eisenberg motion-picture show collab wait to happen .

Other AI news from the last brace of weeks :

Hey , Siri , take a break : Move over , Siri , there ’s a young vox in town ! Learn how to transformyour iPhone ’s action push into a ChatGPT - powered assistantthat ’s ready to outfox , outchat , and outwit .

Is it AI - ll it ’s cracked up to be?:In a plot twist desirable of a tech noir , Apple and Google sidestepped the AI sensation ChatGPTfor their App of the Year crown . And that makes sense — it ’s a competitor to core panorama of both companies ’ concern —   instead top AllTrails and Imprint as their Apps of the Year .

Would you like chips with that?:Elon Musk ’s Neuralink hasslyly added a cool $ 43 million to its coffers , rise that when it comes to financial support , some companies can really think outside the skull .

The lows and lowers of Silicon Valley

Welcome to this week ’s edition of “ Silicon Valley Scandals Weekly ” — your one - stop store for all the jaw - put down tales of tech ’s titans tumble down from their digital thrones . This calendar week , we ’re serving up a juicy piece of schadenfreude Proto-Indo European , featuring none other than Mike Rothenberg , the latest “ disgraced darling ” of Silicon Valley . Connie ’s chronicle reads like acautionary story for ambitious venture capitalist , with Rothenberg link the notorious ranks of Elizabeth Holmes and Sam Bankman - Fried , with a conviction on a staggering 21 counts of fraud and money laundering .

Rothenberg ’s saga is the stuff of thrillers ! From his dazzling twenty-four hours as a self - proclaimed math Olympian rick Harvard MBA grad , to his heady rise as the Bay Area ’s party king , he ’s the man who had it all   .   .   .   until he did n’t . His journeying from the glint heights of speculation cap to the low depths of legal woes is a testament to the age - former adage : What go up , must come down .

Moar Silicon Valley goss :

remain classy , AWS : In an era where tech titans are hotfoot to dominate the generative AI landscape , AWS ’ keynote feel less like windy leadership and more like a jibe fest . AWS CEO Adam Selipsky took cheap shots at competitors , let on more about AWS ’ insecurities than its strong point , Frederic writes .

observe it invigorated in hardware res publica : Hrrgh , I roll in the hay Teenage Engineering , and I apportion Harri ’s excitement : The startup ’s latest creationis induce it incredibly firmly for us not to wrench into a gushing stan — a rare feat in today ’s technical school landscape .

Top reads on TechCrunch the past two weeks

Bailtm : Warren Buffett ’s Berkshire Hathaway , known for its Midas contact , has made a rare stumble , pop off its investment in Indian fintech goliath Paytmwith a 40 % haircut .

Lemme mansplain this one to you : In a world where “ reply guys ” lurk in every digital corner , Mastodon ’s latest featureswoops in like a superhero , offering a shield against the unwanted chatter .

Bringing Jira down for landing : Plane is soar upwards into the labor management arena , dispute the Goliath Jira with its open author innovation . This high - fly newcomer purport to overturn how software teams handle projects .

Bringing in the big guns : Skilled AI expert are as rare as macOS kernel scare , so startup are turn over to an innovative solution : the fractional AI military officer .

So you say there ’s a way : Google has confessed in court thatSpotify has been waltzing through the bid Store without pay the usual debut fees , thanks to a hush - hush agreement .